We all know that annoying couple that spends all their time together, constantly talking about their “perfect” relationship to all their friends and always walking hand-in-hand, side-by-side at every moment during every day. This is the type of couple not afraid of using major PDA and telling each other “I love you” at every opportune moment. Spending any amount of time around them would drive anyone insane. But, you can’t really say much because they’ve been together since before the dawn of time, right? Well, imagine if they just met a mere month ago. Now how annoying does this couple sound?

I hate fake relationships.

Normally, I am not the biggest fan of witnessing any couple’s intimate moment—whether it be holding hands across campus or a quick kiss before a separate class—but I can at least appreciate that maybe those two people have been together for six months or so and this is how they choose to show their affection. Couples like that are cute; not corny, like the people who have known each other shorter than Britney Spears and her first husband.

I call that particular type of couple the “sixth grade couple,” because they do and say all the things a real couple would do, even though they’ve been together for less than half the time. This middle school couple have only recently met, but decided that they had such a deep connection from the first few days they were around each other that turning their acquaintanceship into a relationship was the only solution. They probably never went on a date; they just knew from the very beginning that there was something between them.

The worst thing about this sixth-grade couple is that they become so obsessed with each other that they lose sight of the real world. They start to ignore their real relationships with friends. Instead, they always choose their significant other over a roommate or best friend that has known them for much longer. But as soon as this relationship ends (usually within a couple of months) and they need someone to turn to, they are surprised to find no one there. So, they need to find a new partner to spend all of their empty, alone time with.

Let me say that there is something completely different between a normal couple who loves to spend time together and this sixth grade couple. A normal couple (ideally) had known each other for at least a month, going on various dates and getting to know each other before they decided to make anything Facebook official. If they want to spend their weekends together, then they deserve to, because odds are they didn’t get much time alone during the week.

The middle school couple needs to spend some time apart and slow their romance down. While it’s completely normal to want to spend every living moment together, it’s not to literally spend your days only with your partner and no one else. Girls need their girl time and guys need to spend a day chilling with their bros. It will make your bond stronger and help your relationship last more than a couple of months.

It all comes down to this: we are in college, not middle school. There are more important things to be worrying about over the next four years than who your next boyfriend/girlfriend is going to be. I have always believed that having a significant other is great, but that it shouldn’t take over your entire life, especially when it comes to academics. All of the sixth grade couples out there need to chill out for the next couple of weeks and start focusing on school, not on your obnoxious amount of “I love yous.”

By Mary Pickett

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